
I'm the world's famous cocktail journalist(ess) Anna Väkeväinen - a recognized sipologist but mostly focusing on gonzo reportage. I'm so famous that sometimes replying to all the invitations and fan mail keeps me from doing the actual work: drinking. But I always get back on the track soon.
Ginger, Cinnamon, Chili = CCC = Creat Cool Cocktails we had at the new Farang. They were definetely not ruined by the beauty who served them. With looks and manners of some imaginary Sheikh of Alhaban in a dirty romance novel, he made us feel like having been happily kidnapped to a harem: time for an interview.
I didnt want to know much: just his marital status and his name. Only the latter was disclosed: Not Ross as in Friends, but Rosh with h in the end. Rosh, who's, as it happens, the bar manager himself.
Drank 2 Lady Bois and 1 Lingon Lulu, both Asian infused and superb but the formentioned more to my taste e.g. sweet and crispy sour. Discovered the secret: selfmade syrups and seasoned vodkas.
Headed towards the classic, the American Bar. Had three drinks, but forgot take notes and don't know what they were anymore. One had a lot of ice slush, a Daiquiri? And the other one was red and served in a martini glass. The most interesting was the third one. The cue for it's name is that it made me ask the bartender if it contains potato. "No, it means chili", he replied. Weird.
I did roll out my note pad though. Nodded the bartender Mikko Kemppinen, who seemed flattered to be interviewed by me the WFCJ.
WFCJ: "Why do the cocktails I mix at home nearly always turn shit?" (My vocabulary was getting somewhat limited at this point) He new exactly what I was talking about though.
MK: "Ice gets wet."
I knew it! Every time I bring this up in a conversation with amateurs they look at me like I was a cute but stupid child.
MK: "The ice you use inside the mixer, you throw off afterwards. The ice you use to cool the glasses, throw it off. Use only dry ice in the drinks."
Hah, there you go ignorants: dry ice is possible!
My friend got a text from someone, announcing we had our names on the list for the record release of some band at Belly. "Let's go to Corona bar instead", I suggested. "There will be drink tickets", she replied.
At Belly I drunk what I couldn't get as an environment: Corona. That ment I was officially finishing my night shift and beginning recreational drinking. Sadly, the place was not inhabiting Target Group, which is self evident considering the band: Coldplay number 107. Surrounded by sentimental and all too earnest 19-year olds with cute hairdos like dogs have, I gave up of the possiblity of Details happening, although Chris Martin himself is shagging with that MILF Gwyneth Paltrow; and you never know if the fans might follow. But you know, toy boys are not my thing anyway. And, hate to admit it, I'm not exactly Gwyneth Paltrow.
It was cosy, really, sitting in the corner table with my good old friend, having a chat above our beers. She, seriously commited to a man for a record breaking 12 years already, gave me a couple of useful tips. For example:
The Experienced: "When a man you live with is going out with the boys and suggests on his way out that, "It might be fun for you to stay over at your mum's place tonight!" what do you do?
WFCJ: "I tell him it might be fun for him to stay out on the yard tonight. It might be cool to watch the garbage men come in the morning."
The E: "Oops, oops, oops. You never complain on his behaviour right away. You wait until it's a nice relaxed moment and the situation is not on. And even then, you say it nicely."
WFCJ: "Yeah, but he was obviously just trying to make me go to my mothers because he wants to sleep late and enjoy his own company next day when hang over!"
The E: "Yes, that's his motive."
WFCJ: "That's selfish! And he was trying to make it look like I wanted to go to my mothers! Although he knows I hate my mother!"
The E: "Darling, people are selfish, and their motives are selfish. You need to accept it, and not make a fight out every little detail. You let go." (Did you notice? She said every little Detail!)
WFCJ: "I don't think I'm ready for a serious relationship."
The E: "Oh, you'll grow."
WFCJ: "But I'm already -- " Shit. Sorry, that IS a secret.
The E: "People are just different."
No comments:
Post a Comment